The Woodlands Biotch

i have to step back from my ongoing series about sunscreen and other good advice because a gang of marauding tweeps pissed me off yesterday, and they don’t know who they’re messing with.
if you’re on twitter and you have a blog, chances are you’ve heard of #blogchat. someone put a bug in my ear about it [...]

i don’t do this one enough. i admit it. i mean, on the one hand, i do. i quit working for “the man” (or in my case, “the woman” a while ago. so working for myself is still new. and scary. fun? yes. boring? yes, too. but still, pretty scary.
and then there’s checking my email. [...]

– oh, never mind — you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.  But trust me; in twenty years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.  You [...]

i know you know this song. speech. whatever. as i said the other day, while sitting and watching a kindergarten graduation, i had an idea for a series of blog posts. it actually started before that, but i wasn’t sure which direction i wanted to take with it. i had initially planned on writing a [...]

attended a kindergarten graduation today. had several thoughts. first and foremost being, why didn’t i have a kindergarten graduation?
oh yeah…
cause i skipped kindergarten.
anyway….
another thought i had was a song, actually. you know – “everybody’s free (to wear sunscreen)”. the ultimate graduation song. well, of course it’s not really age-appropriate for kindergarteners. better for college. high [...]

didja hear? the red-headed neighbors are having a garbage community yard sale. they think it’s going to be sooo great, they’re doing it for two days in a row.
now, if the woodlands can manage to condense 90,000 + people’s yard sale desires into a twice-a-year, four hour event, what makes shenandoah think they really have [...]

a lot of people have asked me to join facebook. my mom, for one. repeatedly. and both of my very best, childhood friends. my brother. other friends. they just can’t seem to understand what my big problem is with it. they tell me i’m missing out. there’s apparently a long list of people that really [...]

so here’s the thing; contrary to my previous statements about not using social media because when i want to be social, i do it in the real world, i do in fact use twitter. of course, since i do it using my alias and not my real name, it kind of leaves a bit of [...]

i’ve had a number of experiences lately with people that aren’t exactly giving their all. frankly, it’s starting to piss me off. i mean, if you’re gonna go – go all out for pete’s sake! first it was the sacker at the grocery:
i like to use the smaller carts whenever possible. they’re more maneuverable. i go [...]

you’re a mean one Mr. Smith
you really are a heel.
you’re as cuddly as a cactus,
and as charming as an eel,
mr. smith!
you’re a bad banana,
with a greasy black peel!
you’re a monster, Mr. Smith!
your heart’s an empty hole.
your brain is full of spiders.
you’ve got garlic in your soul,
mr. Smith!
i wouldn’t touch you
with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole!
you’re a [...]