The Woodlands Biotch

a lot of people have asked me to join facebook. my mom, for one. repeatedly. and both of my very best, childhood friends. my brother. other friends. they just can’t seem to understand what my big problem is with it. they tell me i’m missing out. there’s apparently a long list of people that really want to get ahold of me, if i’d just join up. i’ve heard, “it’s just so much easier to keep in touch” and “it’ll be just like old times!”

yeah… no. cause in “old times” i stayed in touch with my friends by calling them. and they called me. and sometimes we called each other several times a day. at a minimum several times a month. and when we grew up and grew apart, far-flung across the country, we could have practically become stockholders in hallmark — if only hallmark was publicly traded and not privately held. we mailed each other cards for birthdays and christmas, easter, st. patrick’s day, valentines day, halloween, thanksgiving, good days, bad days, idle tuesdays…

and now in the age of mobile phones that don’t charge long distance, and email and e-cards eliminating the need to pay postage, you’d think we could stay in contact even easier, right? but apparently i’m missing something here. apparently despite all of these innovations, we still just can’t keep up with each other without using facebook. well, i beg to differ. and i’m not alone.

according to marshall kirkpatrick at readwriteweb, a number of high-profile web industry leaders have quit facebook this week, a turn of events that’s sure to heat up conversation about the social network’s perceived transgressions. and what are these transgressions? constant, unapologetic invasion, and disregard, of privacy. facebook founder mark zuckerberg told a live audience on january 8 that the world has changed, that it’s become more public and less private, and that the controversial new default and permanent settings reflect how the site would work if he were to create it today. facebook’s ceo has a documented history of unethical behavior. from the very beginning of facebook’s existence, there are questions about zuckerberg’s ethics. according to businessinsider.com, he used facebook user data to guess email passwords and read personal email in order to discredit his rivals. these allegations, albeit unproven and somewhat dated, nonetheless raise troubling questions about the ethics of the ceo of the world’s largest social network. they’re particularly compelling given that facebook chose to fork over $65M to settle a related lawsuit alleging that zuckerberg had actually stolen the idea for facebook.

and how complicated are the privacy policies of facebook? well, considering that the collective privacy policies of facebook are more verbose than the united states constitution, i’d say, pretty damn complicated. especially when you consider how disparagingly their privacy policies have eroded over time.

sadly, despite all of this evidence, everyone i know that uses facebook still seems to think that they can be careful enough to not let anything bad happen to them if they keep on using it. and, while it’s true that some people i know truly are smart enough to stay ahead of the game, so many others are not. just as farhad manjoo has talked about at slate.com, it’s undeniable, every previous imbroglio has ended the same way: they all shrug their shoulders, consider the problem fixed, and go back to goofing off on facebook.

so in case you need just a few more reasons to quit facebook, here is what i believe is the best collection of top 10 reasons to quit (click any reason to see the full explanation):

and if you do finally decide that perhaps leaving facebook is the right choice, there is at least one strong alternative coming to light that may help you with your withdrawals. it’s called diaspora* (yes, with the asterisk) which is marketing itself as the “anti-facebook”

as for me, i intend to leave things as they are. stick with my status quo. there’s no reason why anyone can’t have a private life – even when it’s online. and a public life – out there in the real world. and as for keeping in touch with my friends and family? well, i think i need to send out a few emails in the morning. it’s been a couple of days. ;o)